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Mixed emotions....ahhhh!

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  • Mark'sbabygirl Mark'sbabygirl's Avatar 09-24-09 | 02:36 PM
  • So this Saturday is DH and I's 3rd dating anniversary. For some STUPID reason about a month ago I thought it would be a good time for us to start our "date nights" as it is very important to us to make sure we nurture our marriage. My MIL is going to watch her and we are only going to be gone for a couple of hours (2-3 tops) just to eat, but of course I am nervous as HECK about it! I totally trust MIL- she is wonderful and sweet and very nurturing and is great with Hope, but just doesn't know her that well yet. She is going to come over early so that we can go over some things with her and then we will wait until Hope eats and hopefully falls asleep before we leave. She has been awake alot during the day lately so I don't know if she will go to sleep or not. A
    DH is fine if we change our minds, but my BF is totally encouraging me to go (she doesn't have anyone near her to watch her kids and she has a 4 and 1 1/2 year old). DH really wants to go and I think I just need to do it. I do trust MIL and we will only be 15 mins away if we need to come home. Encouragement please!
    Hope is doing much better with her reflux and is feeling alot better most of the time. Today will be a sad one though as we are having to have one of our dogs (we have 5) put to sleep. She is really old and woke up this morning and couldn't walk. We knew it was coming, but it is still hard. She was DH"s dog origianlly and I know his heart is hurting. We are having someone come to our house to do it because it stresses her greatly to have to go to the vet.
    At least she got to meet Hope....
  • LAB LAB's Avatar 09-24-09 | 03:29 PM
  • I'm glad you have so much support! If you want to go, or at least try to go, have lots of fun! Its so hard leaving a little one behind even in capable hands. If your mommy instinct kicks in and tells you not to go, then follow that. Its so nice to get away for a few hours when you need it, but if it causes you stress then its not helpful!

    I have a personality that doesn't need to be away from my babies until they are mobile and can talk back
    My DH respects me and we always take our baby with us while leaving older kids where they will have more fun. I feel very exposed and incomplete without my baby the first yr or so. I can't enjoy myself at all! I have friends that need a few hours away every so often and it makes them a better mother. Some mothers feel the need to work full/part time. There is no right or wrong, just what works for you!

    I'm so sorry about your doggie!

Thank you LAB!
Mark'sbabygirl (09-25-09)
  • Dopey406 Dopey406's Avatar 09-24-09 | 04:10 PM

    about the dog.

    I'm on the fence about going out. I miss my kiddos when I'm away and I love coming home to them. BUT--I also think that keeping a marriage alive is KEY to providing a stable, forever home for those kiddos so if going out to dinner for two hours will accomplish that, then it's definitely worth the time away.

    Our first date night with our first was out to see Finding Nemo at the theater. Nemo has big cheeks, just like Sarah did, and I cried through half the movie missing her--but in the end, it was great to get out with my husband and enjoy some time alone with him.

    And think of it from the dad's perspective...he probably misses his wife and wants some time to talk to her without a baby in her arms.
    I find it endearing that he wants some time away with you.

    I wouldn't leave her overnight but to get out for a couple of hours can be very refreshing, especially for a first-time mama.

Thank you Dopey406!
Mark'sbabygirl (09-25-09)
  • 3Princes 09-24-09 | 05:41 PM

    Even if it's just for an hour. MIL has to get to know her sometime. Take your cellphone (but don't call!) and if she needs you she will call you. I was very hesitant at first but grandparents are a wonderful gift to your children and will have a totally different relationship than you have with them.
    It's really easy to lose yourself when you have kids. Even now sometimes I sit around and think, "hmm... what do I like doing? What did my hobbies used to even be?" I love love love being a parent, and I went out and had my fun, but a couple hours every now and then to reconnect with hubby is crucial IMO.

    Go and have fun.
Thank you 3Princes!
Mark'sbabygirl (09-25-09)
  • lauralkemp lauralkemp's Avatar 09-24-09 | 06:53 PM
  • I feel your pain as a first time mommy. I can't imagine having to work out of the home and put Joseph in daycare. My mother is wonderful and will give DH and I time alone as long as we give her plenty of notice. I know i need time for me. It does make me a better mommy.
Thank you lauralkemp!
Mark'sbabygirl (09-25-09)

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