I would not think that spanking is allowed at daycare, but am wondering if it one of those things where if a parent gives permission, the teacher can spank your child.

I am not asking b/c I want them to spank my child, but b/c my child has made it sound like the teachers do spank some of the other children. I asked her if they have ever spanked her and she said no, but that they spank so-and-so and another so-and-so.

I should also include that my daughter is pretty much a sponge and then squeezes out all the information & stuff she hears at daycare when she gets home. She is constantly pretending to be a teacher and yelling at all her kids in class. "Sit down, hands in your lap!" "I'm talking you, you not listening, go in time out!" "Do you want me to call your mommy? Go sit down!" She has even grabbed a play phone and "called" a parent.

I can't say that it doesn't concern me with the amount of disciplining that her teachers seem to do, but I also try to take into consideration that it is a 3-4 year old class and I know how much my child listens so well at home. (sarcasm there, lol) And that my dd is learning- we can see that. And she has friends in her class, they bring home artwork & homework, and she actually wants to show her teachers when she has a new bracelet or bag or something. I do think her teachers are a little strict and maybe overwhelmed, so they appear to the kids to be yelling all the time. (she has even told me didn't like her teachers, while she liked the prior teacher in the younger 3's class) But what can I do? There isn't an alternate older 3's class and later this fall she will move on to VPK.

Anyways, so with all this background info, when I hear her "threatening" a kid in her "class" with a spanking and she said it has happened when I asked her about it, I am inclined to believe her. On the other hand, I know she is capable of fibbing to get attention or b/c she is wary of getting in trouble if I think she lied, so she just goes with it . I don't know if this is something I want to approach her teacher or the center directors about in case she was fibbing, or exaggerating , or possibly a misunderstanding. She told me she has never been spanked, but that other kids have. I remember catching her other daycare center being overly firm with a child & was told they were given permission by the parents to treat him that way.

What would you think of this? And should I say something?

I do think that maybe you should mention it casually.

Like" I watched DD playing "school" yesterday and she punished one of here students with a spanking. This isn't something we do at home and I wondered where spanking falls as a discipline action here? Never or with parental consent? I also thought it was possible she picked it up from a friend who does get spanked at home."

I think in this way you aren't accusing anyone just feeling them out.
I hope it helps.

Could she be mistaking a pat to move a child along for a spanking?

It should never be allowed at a licensed daycare, with or without "permission." You could ask about why she might be saying that--- perhaps another child is playing "school" or "house" that way, or perhaps there is more going on.
I pulled Matthew from a daycare because he kept coming home and speaking through gritted teeth saying his teacher said "SIT DOWN AT THE TABLE!!!" and other things. 3 year olds are active and need lots of redirection but most of the time, it shouldn't be through shouting or demanding. There are times it does happen, but IMO they should be few and far between. If the structure, routine, and consistency has been taught, there's no need for it.

Well, I already pulled her from 1 daycare when she was 2 and put her in where she is at now. This is actually the 3rd class she has been in since she started in the 2's, then moved to younger 3's, and now is in the older 3's.

I think her teachers are seriously overwhelmed....and maybe not 100% in love with their job anymore. It makes me sad...if you are taking care of other peoples children, you need to love it, have tons of patience, and compassion. And it seems like everywhere I look the teachers seem to have lost that somewhere along the way. And we cannot afford the places where there are probably teachers who still love their jobs. *sigh*

I think I am going to have to set up a chat with the director. I just hate the thought of everything I say getting back to teachers and them knowing it was me, or suspecting it was me, and then they start resenting me or my kid & treating them differently. I know, I know- if that happens I should pull them out....but then where do we go? We make too much to be considered for government assistance, but not enough for the pricey places I looked at. Ugh....

Someone get me a hat....it's time for a pity party!