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  • 3Princes 05-09-10 | 08:34 PM
  • Here's a little Mother's Day WWYD...

    Let's suppose it's *Father's* Day, and you, your DH, your parents, and his parents are all having lunch together. You normally all get something for each of the fathers. Gifts are opened, and you realize that your parents have bought something for your husband's father (your father in law) but absolutely nothing for your husband. After the day is over, you walk your parents out and are alone with them, and neither of them says there was a mix up with the gift or that they forgot it.

  • rudolphia rudolphia's Avatar 05-09-10 | 09:58 PM
  • It would depend on whether I knew dh would be upset about it. My dh doesn't really care about getting gifts and would prefer not to be acknowledged by people outside our immediate family, so I wouldn't do anything. However, I DO care about recognition and would have my feelings hurt, so I'd want dh to speak up if the same thing happened for mother's day. I'm guessing your in-laws have struck again, huh?
  • Chickie Chickie's Avatar 05-09-10 | 10:07 PM
  • I don't believe in buying or giving gifts based on the premis of "because you should" or "because it is fair" and therefore I don't worry about receiving gifts based on the same. For both my dh and for me, neither of us would have thought much of it. Also, we do not have any ongoing issues with in-laws, so we probably would have no reason to look deeply into the lack of a gift.

    The difference between inlaws and outlaws is that outlaws are wanted.
  • imagine imagine's Avatar 05-09-10 | 10:53 PM
  • I would ask them why they went and got dh's dad a gift but not him!! that just dont seem normal to me, but then again my parents dont buy gifts for me or dh not even on our b-day's and we dont ever have dinner with both his and my parents unless it's ds b-day! lol
  • LAB LAB's Avatar 05-10-10 | 01:02 AM
  • I'd think it was odd, but wouldn't bring it up. Maybe they got mixed up or who knows. If it happened again the next yr then I'd take it personally and talk with my parents.

    If they had been off to him or mean before this happened I'd be upset that he was outwardly not included in the family. My mom adored my DH and loved him as her own always. I think how a parent treats their son or daughter in law on a daily type basis is much more important then giving a present on a minor holiday.

    My inlaws used to have big monthly birthday parties. Every single yr there would be a 1/2 dozen names on the cake and mine was always year after yr left off the cake when we were celebrating birthdays before and after mine. My DH finally stood up to his mom and told her that it hurt him that his wife wasn't included. My MIL has never been one to try to make me feel like one of the family though. It hurt my DH while I accepted it as reality of my situation. It took like 7 yrs before she started to try a little to make me feel welcome. I "stole" her baby and apparently he should have never married and had a family! After he graduated from college and started a career she realized that maybe I wasn't out to ruin his life! Its odd though as they've never been close. Honestly he'd never call his parents for anything unless I told him he should. While writing this I realized that I forgot to tell DH to call his mom today. I told him yesterday to remember and then we forgot today. Oops! I did buy her a present. When they get back in the state we'll give it to them! If it were up to my DH she'd get nothing
    I got her a baby gate for her stairs as I wanted them to have one


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