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Embarrassing birth stories

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Old 10-12-04, 04:51 AM
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Wink Embarrassing birth stories

Do you have a really funny or embarrassing birth story to share?
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Old 10-12-04, 09:50 AM
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When my son was born, my water broke at home. The doctor sent me to the hospital immediatley. I had a big, constant leak of water. I went through three pairs of pants at home trying to figure out how to get to the hospital relatively dry since it was snowing and cold out. When I got to the hospital at 6:30 am, I went to the nurses station of the maternity dept. to check in. As I stand there with a towel wedged between my legs (my last resort), she said to me--- "Are you sure your water has broken?" I waddled around the desk and showed her the towel between my legs. She laughed at me. But, really, what's a girl to do when that happens??

It isn't hysterical, but it sure was embarrassing! I felt like an idiot waddling around with a towel between my legs!
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Old 10-13-04, 12:05 AM
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My water broke at home too -- (for #2 that is)
I was mortified and sobbing uncontrollably about my pants being soaking wet by the time I got to the hospital.
The leaking wasn't so bad when I left for the hospital and i had a super maxi pad on my underpants. I honestly thought that was going to do it. But as I sat there in the hospital (waiting to actually get a room
 
) the gushing started and by the time I got to the bed to take my clothes off, I was soaked... my socks were soaked.. and I felt like I had seriously wet my pants. DH tried his best to calm me down. He got an extra plastic bag for my wet clothes and helped me out of them. He never once made me feel bad for what I felt was 'peeing my pants'.

With #1, it's only funny now.
I had gone in 2 days before because of preeclampsia symptoms. The Drs had sent me home with a home hypertention plan and bedrest, but the tests I did at home had me back in the hospital for more tests 2 days later.
But, by their directions, I came in eventhough they were completely full. When I had had the tour of the hospital, they showed us a janitorial closet that they said was an emergency overflow area until a room became available. Sure enough, it was full and I got to sit on a gurney all day in the closet. (that said storage on the plaque on the wall outside the door) They had all the brooms and mops sitting in the hall outside
 
Because it was a solid door, they had it swung wide open and a makeshift cheesy screen infront of the door. A screen that had cracks so that anyone walking by could peek in to see. And, peek everyone did. So I sat there ALL DAY watching people peek in at me. No radio, No tv, Not even a phone to tell DH what was going on.(or rather, NOT going on) I heard several babies be born while waiting. They cathed me for a clean urine catch (that's embarrassing in and of itself), and I finally had to go pee. Since I was in the closet, I had to unattach myself from the monitors and wander down the hall to find a nurse to direct me to a public toilet.
 

 

I asked if there surely wasn't a room available YET as I had been in there all day and had heard the babies born... they told me no (but when I was walking to the toilet, I saw empty rooms). I was totally
 
they thought I was just in there wasting their time.
Of course, it turned out that at 6pm that evening, I had an emergency c-section when they finally got their heads out of their butts and realized what was going on!!
 


Oh, that reminds me of when I was going in for #2, my water broke, I had pneumonia and a major fever etc... the nurse at the check in counter was telling me that they had no rooms left when I started crying, "no, not the closet again!!" The nurse was sympathetic to my plea I guess cuz she went and asked the last woman who was admitted if I could share with her.
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Old 10-13-04, 03:48 PM
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When I was in labor with DS I was supposed to have an epi but the anisteologist was too late (it took him 2 1/2 to get to my room, thats another story). So I was going natural. When it was time to start pushing, I guess you can say that I was not very quiet. I actually tore while pushing so I let out a yell. Later after my little man was here and the Dr and nurses were finishing up we were chatting. The nurse let me know that there was a child birth class having their tour while I was pushing. She said one of the guys turn white as a ghost when he heard me....
 
I thought that was funny.
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Old 10-13-04, 06:03 PM
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When I was beginning pushing with my DD, the nurse had me on my side for a few "test pushes" before the real thing. I pushed once and during the second push, she said, "Okay! I think we should get you ready and not push anymore until the doctor gets here." And as she said it, she pulled her hand out from under the blanket and glove was full of crap! Yes, while I was pushing a load of kaka came out, right into her hand! DH about flipped and she casually took of the glove and washed her hands, all while patiently explaining that it was normal and actually a good sign that I was pushing correctly and that the baby was moving down.

I'll never forget the look on DH's face when she pulled back her poop-filled hand!
 
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