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  • dawnmarie dawnmarie's Avatar 10-02-06 | 06:25 PM

    thank all you ladies for your congrats and well wishes! i have found this past week since our great news, that a few people i thought were really good friends...haven't at all been supportive.

    From 3 different people I have gotten "oh, that's nice, did you want another girl?" or "that's good, let me tell you about my issues...."



    And a couple of them have had fertility issues! wtf!!!!!
    They have acted like/and or spoken to me as if I went to the store and bought a dam cheese danish or something!

    My dh and I both agree that alot of their reactions stem from me NOT GIVING BIRTH to this child. SO, because I am not her bio mom, it's not as "serious" or important.

    I have decided that I need to be done with these so called friends , I never would treat someone like that whom had just "had a baby" so I didn't expect to be treated like that. I guess I will run into people like that the rest of my life that don't feel adoption is "the same" as giving birth to a baby.
    Sorry I knew you ladies would get it....
    again thanks so much for your thoughts!
  • imagine imagine's Avatar 10-02-06 | 10:05 PM
  • Im sorry your friends view adoption like it's buying candy in the fast stop!! I hope that their opinions wont get you down!! I think it's the best thing in the world to be able to adopt a child in need of a home and loving family!! good luck and congrats on your new baby girl!
  • BnBMommy BnBMommy's Avatar 10-02-06 | 10:19 PM
  • Congrats, that is awesome. I am sorry that you are finding that friends aren't being as supportive as they should. I find that the ladies here are so much better than most people I know IRL as well!
  • baby hungry 10-02-06 | 11:41 PM
  • Dawn I am so sorry you were hurt by your friends. Your news was just as exciting as any new Mom who might have given birth. Adoption is an amazing birth story. Don't let mean people take that away from you. Mahri is beautiful, treasured by you and your family, and will be loved and welcomed with nothing but the most excited arms in the entire world. That's really all that matters. Pooey on anyone who fails to get that.

    Someone recently told Bryan "adoption just isn't the same as giving birth". You know.. they are right it's not the same, but it's not any less joyful or any less to be celebrated. In fact it's just awsome!! The bible says when talking about Jesus, "unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given". I'm not even trying at all to compair any adopted children to Jesus, but don't you think it's just darn cool that you also get to experience the amazing gratitude and love of someone giving you your child? Just like Jesus was given to us, your little Mahri is given to your family. (sorry I didn't mean for that to sound so preachy)

    I am beyond thrilled for you guys, and can hardly stand waiting to see more pictures exspecially of one with her Mom holding her with all the love she has.

    Thinking of you.

  • mac71 mac71's Avatar 10-03-06 | 05:05 AM
  • I'm so sorry you are not getting the support and excitment from your friends. I've no experience of adoption but I do feel that adopting your child is as much if not more important than giving birth (as in you are giving your daughter an amazing gift of a new life). I've often said to DH that just because people give birth to a child that doesn't mean that DNA makes the child any more special - they could still grow up to be a pain in the A**. Its how you bring up your child and the love you give them is whats important. (This is our opinion only - no offence to anyone

    I think Mahri is a beautiful girl and you will be a wonderful mother to her like you are to Chloe and I can't wait for a family pic when you are reunited together as a family.

    Last edited by mac71; 10-03-06 at 05:16 AM..