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  • Catherinems 11-30-05 | 11:13 AM
  • Hi Everybody,
    I am brand new to here...and pretty much a novice as far as these sites are concerned....Registered to one or two in the past but found them confusing to flollow....Anyhow was recommended to here by here I am!

    Have been trying to conceive for what seems like an eternity...over 3years. Thought that it would all be so simple and straightforward, left it rather late (am 42! and dad to be...whatever the term is sorry!) is 52!...Clock is ticking ever faster. But trying to stay calm.

    Have had 5 miscarriages...not much more that I can say about you know devastated doesn't come close to a decription.

    Just had 3 months off from trying after two very early unconfirmed failed pregnancies in succession. (I have made a point of not counting these up for fear I will go insane!)...And back at it agin this month. AF (Is that what you call it here?
    is due today....amd hoping and praying and doing everything that I can think of...but to be honest feeling pretty desperate at the moment. Feel like saying something really dramatic just here, like, don't know how much more I can take...but know in, probably with all of you, will carry on as long as I possibly can!

    All around me seem to fall pregnant at the drop of a hat., and I am very happy for them...but I am sure you all know that churning feeling inside.

    All my close friends and family are fertile and almost without exception have children, and so it is very difficult to confide in them, or to get any real comfort....sounds ungrateful, but I don;t mean to be that...just looking for others who are maybe akin to me.

    Anyway....that is my life story (or so it feels...hardly remebmer what it was like not to be trying!)...seems to be a day for it.

    Hopefully I will be able to lend some support here also...I am a good listener, and look forward to getting to know some of you.

    All the very best
  • baby hungry 12-01-05 | 12:31 AM
  • Hi Ems. Welcome to our board! I am deeply sorry to hear about your struggle to be a Mom. It is beyond heart breaking. I can not even begin to imagine all of your losses. Have the doctors figured out why this keeps happening to you?

    I look foward to getting to know you better and supporting you on your journey to being a Mom.


  • AmiKW AmiKW's Avatar 12-01-05 | 01:22 AM
  • I'm not on this board, but wanted to welcome you and tell you that you found a great site! These girls are life-savers some days! I hope that you're on the last leg of your ttc journey and you reach sucess very soon!
    Goodluck to you!
  • Tracey and Neil Tracey and Neil's Avatar 12-01-05 | 07:33 PM
  • YAY Emma!!!!!

    So glad you decided to test us out!!
    The most difficult bit about this site is getting used to all the lovely US ladies speaking 'American' - but you'll pick up the lingo soon enough!

    (((((((huge hugs)))))))) :
  • Catherinems 12-02-05 | 06:36 AM
  • Thank you all so much! That was a lovely welcome!

    As far as anything all sounds so depressing...but very briefly...have a woman next door who has been abusing us (mentally) for the past two and a half years. (The authorities are involved, but the law in this country is not an easy thing to get your head around) Some of the things that she has said to me about my childlessness I would love to tell you here...but really will only upset people.

    Anyhow...sorry long time to get to the point...the stress that I am sufferning due to her, is what the medics put it down to, as we have had so many tests done...and we always hear...'Its good news!'...

    I am pretty 42 (just!) and so makes it all the more panicky, thinking that time will run out on me...but the drs tell me that I am fertile and good and that I am lucky (in the nicest possible way) as I am actually abe to conceive unlike the majority of woman they have sitting in front of them of my age. I am grateful for that

    ...and I know they are least I do get that glimmer of hope...thing is, at times like this when AF is late, and everything feels like it is all systems now fills me with a feeling of dread as it is so difficult to think positively for fear of the possible outcome and familiar hurt.

    As with so many others I have no option than to keep going and I will as long as I can...I hope that I haven't drained all your Energy....thank you for listening!

    Ems x

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