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Old 09-01-18, 10:33 AM
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Unhappy TTC and BD

The last two months of TTC we have been more "lax" with the BD. Maybe twice a fertile window. This month I said okay we need to be a little more frequent to make this baby happen. My husband HATES scheduled sex and does not fully understand how small of a window we really have. So this month only 2 days again. However it was 2 consecutive days (Wednesday/Thursday with (+) OPK on Thursday). I am hopeful but not even convinced that is enough to get pregnant. We are both 34 yrs old and I am just annoyed with the process at the moment. How do you keep spontaneity but purposeful sex?? The first two months I keep my O days to myself but this month I just really wanted to communicate how important and more effective frequent sex will be. We have spontaneous sex other wise throughout the month. I am just discouraged because I do not feel I can express my frustrations to him without him becoming upset with the situation and turned off completely from this whole idea of having a baby, but I dont want to ruin anything we currently have. We've been married for 6 years and together for 12 years. The other night he even said "I know what I'm getting, there's no mystery or surprise". (not because of ovulation week, just talking in generalities about sex. So how do we spice it up!!?? he's not a lingerie guy at all--I initiate often...so I am at a loss!!!
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Old 09-24-18, 11:55 AM
is TTC, India, 29YO
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mabergman
 
The last two months of TTC we have been more "lax" with the BD. Maybe twice a fertile window. This month I said okay we need to be a little more frequent to make this baby happen. My husband HATES scheduled sex and does not fully understand how small of a window we really have. So this month only 2 days again. However it was 2 consecutive days (Wednesday/Thursday with (+) OPK on Thursday). I am hopeful but not even convinced that is enough to get pregnant. We are both 34 yrs old and I am just annoyed with the process at the moment. How do you keep spontaneity but purposeful sex?? The first two months I keep my O days to myself but this month I just really wanted to communicate how important and more effective frequent sex will be. We have spontaneous sex other wise throughout the month. I am just discouraged because I do not feel I can express my frustrations to him without him becoming upset with the situation and turned off completely from this whole idea of having a baby, but I dont want to ruin anything we currently have. We've been married for 6 years and together for 12 years. The other night he even said "I know what I'm getting, there's no mystery or surprise". (not because of ovulation week, just talking in generalities about sex. So how do we spice it up!!?? he's not a lingerie guy at all--I initiate often...so I am at a loss!!!
This happens with us too. My husband hates scheduled sex too. I have understood that it's better to not schedule and go by its own flow. Even if you are scheduling it in your mind, try to make it look like a spontaneous one. Get creative and enjoy sex. Take a break. Things will fall in place.
 
Hope that helps you
 
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