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Men's reactions & conceiving

Men's reactions & conceiving

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  • Cracker_Jac Cracker_Jac's Avatar 09-21-04 | 12:01 PM
  • My husband reacted differently to each loss. He was supportive, but with less emotion when I m/c at 5-1/2 weeks. I also believe that perhaps men/family members have difficult expressing emotions with an early m/c. I also believe that people have a tendency not to relate/understand a woman’s loss if they do not visibly see a baby or u/s.

    DH had a very difficult time when we loss Posey at 21 weeks. He came with me at every u/s and saw her heartbeat and growth during that time frame. I am still haunted by his reaction when we found out the fate of our baby.

    I have a question regarding this issue. How many of you have husbands that seem to have forgotten our losses? Or state that we need to move on? I have a very difficult time with the dates of loss and turn blue often. I should be happy that I have a baby boy in my life, but I do miss the little girl that I have lost. My husband feels that I should no longer grieve because I have a baby in my arms. I find it rather heartless that he says this. Anyone else experience these issues?
  • Bethann73 Bethann73's Avatar 09-21-04 | 02:28 PM
  • My DH was very sad and emotional when we lost our baby. He cried with me and supported me. He still says things like "What do you think our baby would be like today ?" and then he'd get very sad. But he also gets mad at people that say... "Just think... if you didn't have your first loss you probably wouldn't have Aedan. " He freaks on them and says "you can't replace the loss of one child with the birth of another!!". He's my hero and understands the loss.

    We waited til AF showed up(exactly 30 days after the D&C) and then we were given the green light to start trying agin. You have to decide for yourself when you are ready.

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