My Journey to get to this point

WOO HOO. I just found out on August 7th, with a home digital, I"M PREGNANT!I loved seeing "pregnant" i would stare at it.. Everything was so wonderful, husband and kids were happy. Until the unexpected twists came.
Pain in my stomach, sharp, shooting, i thought it was just 'growing pains'.. The doctor got me in his office the same day. Which was August 15th. Did a u/s to find a "blob". Told me i would have to come back Friday for another u/s.
Week went by so upset but was still hopeful!
With in the week blood tests were done to find out levels were only at 171. Friday rolled around and i was so excited to see a heartbeat, but come to find out the "blob" didn't grow or was there a heartbeat to hear. Right after he pulled the u/s out he looked at me, and said "did you know you were bleeding"?
My heart sank and i cried my eyes out, as he told me what to expect in the next 48 hours and to keep clots, to do autopsy's on them. weeks went by and i was starting to heal emtionally and physcially. As more blood tests were done.

Went to church Sunday August 28th. Sitting in at church i doubled over in pain that i have never felt before... It was pain that i will never be able to describe, or want to feel again. My husband drove 90 mi. in a 35 to rush me to the ER.
I was rushed in, and put on a IV, pain medicaitions. as every 30 min-1hr i was wanting more pain meds. U/S were done and there was neither a sac, or any baby that they could see.

I finally was rushed to a main hosptial for ER surgery to find out what was going on. Levels went up 171-182-210.
I was in shock and wondering what my body was doing. As i was getting prepared for surgery all i could pray about is i hope everything is okay. No-where did i think while in surgery they had to remove my tube and the baby that was stuck inside. My heart sank so low, as i asked softly to my nurse. " did you really take my baby"?
She not only said the baby but my tube. this has been such an emtional roller coaster i just keep writing down all my thoughts ... I only know that GOD has my plan in his hands and i will lean on him for all my answers. Thanks for taking time to read my journey.

Steph

I'm so sorry Steph
 

I'm sorry for your loss
 

There are too many of us who understand loss. It's aching pain...
I will keep you in my thoughts.

 
I'm so sorry.

Thank you all so much, it's been really hard. However i know one day things will all come to clear. It hurts because my past preg. i had no problems like this at all. Now that we were trying finally got preg it all went down hill from there. It's really hard to comprehend but i know, that you all know how i feel and understand me. It's been a rough journey because ALL i see if everyone getting preg. and it hurts because i couldn't have my preg. healthy.
Thank you all so much. means alot. <3