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UGH more nanny drama (not too horrible)

UGH more nanny drama (not too horrible)

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  • JoanneE JoanneE's Avatar 08-30-04 | 07:07 PM
  • I got a call from a friend who is a nanny. She does a lot of playdates with our nanny (Annie) and the kids. They had a playdate last Thursday and apparently Annie was very short-tempered with the kids. Kaylie had mentioned to me over dinner that night that she'd had a rough day but didn't elaborate too much except to say that Annie had disciplined her for something she'd said to CJ. I didn't think too much of it until my friend called.

    My friend also expressed concern that Annie's personal life is chaotic now, with lots of men and evening partying, and perhaps some illicit substances. I asked if she thought our nanny was bringing these things into our home or it was a problem during work hours, and she said she didn't think so. But she did say she thought that the evening activities were affecting Annie's professionalism and energy level at work.

    My FIL said he has observed a shorter temper on our nanny's part and Annie seems to be on the phone (presumably with men) more than in the past.

    I was super worried, and then took Kaylie out for ice cream and quizzed her about how things were going. Kaylie said Annie was cranky Thursday but usually isn't very cranky. She said she gets along well with Annie and doesn't think Annie uses the phone much. She even commented that Annie complained one afternoon when the phone rang repeatedly in the afternoon. I asked if Kaylie thought CJ was getting along ok with Annie, and she thought CJ was doing ok too.

    So... I'm planning to talk with Annie tonight, to let her know that we have observed she has been more stressed and cranky lately. She has obviously lost weight, and I'll mention we're worried about her health, whether she's getting enough rest, etc. She starts her bachelor's degree classes in a couple of weeks, which provides a perfect excuse for me to express concern about her personal life and stress level. And, I'll indicate that we are concerned that whatever personal stress she is experiencing has affected her work, and she needs to not let that happen.

    I've had a really good relationship with Annie over the years so I think if I can signal to her that she can't be complacent about her job she'll shape up very quickly. And, we'll all keep a closer eye on her interactions with the kids to make sure things improve. FIL is around the house a lot, and our nanny friend will continue to have playdates with her. I've got a good group of spies!

    Any thoughts? I'd certainly appreciate any advice! We have 2 more years before CJ is in kindy, at which point we'll probably rely on after-school care at their school and/or my MIL will work PT to help out. MIL could switch to PT work sooner, but we've thought we could hold off on that a few more years.

  • :domesticgoddess: :domesticgoddess:'s Avatar 08-30-04 | 07:16 PM
  • I think you're handling it beautifully. Maybe the discussion will nudge her back to where she needs to be for your children.
  • janney janney's Avatar 08-30-04 | 08:55 PM
  • I think you are doing everything perfectly. Good luck with the talk and follow up with us!
  • Diane1212 Diane1212's Avatar 08-31-04 | 11:43 AM
  • I also agree that your plan sounds good to talk to her, and then you can base your actions from there on her responses. I wish you luck!
  • BethandBrandon BethandBrandon's Avatar 08-31-04 | 11:43 AM
  • Quote de :domesticgoddess:
    I think you're handling it beautifully. Maybe the discussion will nudge her back to where she needs to be for your children.
    I agree! I think you have a good plan and having some good "spies" is always a good thing!

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